Taking in Acknowledgment – Shelagh Brown
Shelagh Brown is a friend of mine – tall, willowy, beautiful inside and out. She is the kind of person that is
hard to miss, even in a crowd. She is known as someone who is competent and trustworthy. When I first met her, I knew I wanted to know her better – just as I gravitated toward her, so do others.
As we were talking, she mentioned that she was having difficulty taking in acknowledgment. It's been an off-and-on issue for her, as it is with so many others. So we decided to take a look at that and see what was getting in her way.
When we traced the issue back, it started when she was around 3, being afraid of not being 'good.' Her immature mind decided she was only safe if she was quiet and stuffed her 'noise.' As you can see from the picture, her mouth is tightly closed.
She also concluded that she had to be small and not noticed, in order to avoid getting in trouble. Since Shelagh was always tall for her age – 5'10" today – being small was acutely difficult. That kind of distortion of reality is only feasible in the mind.
Once we waded through the difference between Real Reality and what she made up when she was 3, she looked back over our conversation and said, "I was trying to live my life without being there." Which is why receiving acknowledgment seemed such a threat to her safety – it spotlighted her.
By the time we wound up our conversation, she was back on track, having reclaimed her right to speak up – make 'noise' and be noticed. Receiving acknowledgment isn't an all-the-time issue with Shelagh. This was just an episode with that issue that allowed her to reclaim even more of herself than before. When I asked if I could share her story, she not only agreed easily, she also sent me the pictures – which is testimony to her willingness to be seen and revealed for the Spiritual Warrior she is. Thank you, Shelagh!
How are you with taking in acknowledgment? Are you graceful with it? or duck it altogether? or do whatever you can to make sure you Get acknowledgment? or slough it off? or turn it back to the person who acknowledges you?
