Dismantling the Addiction to Fear

Especially for Jessica and Wendy

Addictions turn into gods. It's amazingly simple to give worth-ship to something else. AND, it takes intentional perseverance. It's simple not to put a cigarette in your mouth, and it requires vigilance and a commitment to a higher purpose/goal to be tobacco-free. 

One of my worst fears was speaking extemporaneously in public, in the limelight. People who know me now will probably scoff; but 35 years ago, it was real. When I first started teaching at Houston Community College, leading talks for singles groups, etc., I had violent diarrhea before each presentation – every time.

I didn't think to dismantle that fear. I was used to it. When I finally had had enough, i.e., woke up to the fact that I didn't have to live like that, I imagined the worst possible scenario (people booing, throwing rotten tomatoes). Then instead of tucking my tail and trying to disappear, I imagined myself either calling them out or leaving with dignity and grace, learning something new about myself, about people, about Life. 

First, it takes the positive power of being fed up (John Rankin).
Second, face the dragon – worst case, 2nd worst case, 3rd worst case.
Third, if any of it ever happens, imagine how you will address each situation …. REALLY. Mean it with total resolve.

It is a game changer.