The Road to Hell

Dr. Brad Brown used to say, “the fastest slide into hell is to compare!” Comparing anything of mine to anything of yours is certain to diminish one of us.

Comparison works on every level imaginable – body/health, relationships, talent, job, money, status, political/religious views – the reactive mind uses even little things.

The usual comparison works like this. I compare my training skill to Brad’s and come up short. I compare my writing on the white board to Sylvia’s, my weight lifting pounds to Darlene’s or Kay’s, and I’m not as good as they are. Beautiful movie stars? Yep, no way do I measure up. Each comparison takes another whack at my self-esteem.

In order to get my self-esteem back, I go the other way, look down my nose at “them.” No way would I say any of this out loud, but …(whisper – .”I would never be in a relationship like theirs! I’m better, more fit, more experienced, more, more…. ) I can always make someone “less” in some area. Whew! I’m back on top again.

Really? Whether I am diminishing myself or someone else, I’m cutting myself out of the relationship. And deep inside, I feel icky … behaving like a spiritual harpy (a bird of prey with a woman’s face) attacking myself or others.

The way back home to my true heart – seeing through compassionate eyes – each of us inhabits that spark of life, all of us being works in progress – especially me. LOL.

PS This image solidifies my intent not to go there.


2 Responses

  1. Ellen Hoepner

    To be mature you have to realize what you value most. It is extraordinary to discover that comparatively few people reach this level of maturity. They seem never to have paused to consider what has value for them. They spend great effort and sometimes make great sacrifices for values that, fundamentally, meet no real needs of their own. Perhaps they have imbibed the values of their particular profession or job, of their community or their neighbors, of their parents or family. Not to arrive at a clear understanding of one’s own values is a tragic waste. You have missed the whole point of what life is for.”

    — Eleanor Roosevelt, You Learn by Living

    Sharing an email that came in after your post. Awe Life! Thanks Teacher❤️

Leave a Reply