Dr. Brad Brown used to say, “the fastest slide into hell is to compare!” Comparing anything of mine to anything of yours is certain to diminish one of us.
Comparison works on every level imaginable – body/health, relationships, talent, job, money, status, political/religious views – the reactive mind uses even little things.
The usual comparison works like this. I compare my training skill to Brad’s and come up short. I compare my writing on the white board to Sylvia’s, my weight lifting pounds to Darlene’s or Kay’s, and I’m not as good as they are. Beautiful movie stars? Yep, no way do I measure up. Each comparison takes another whack at my self-esteem.
In order to get my self-esteem back, I go the other way, look down my nose at “them.” No way would I say any of this out loud, but …(whisper – .”I would never be in a relationship like theirs! I’m better, more fit, more experienced, more, more…. ) I can always make someone “less” in some area. Whew! I’m back on top again.
Really? Whether I am diminishing myself or someone else, I’m cutting myself out of the relationship. And deep inside, I feel icky … behaving like a spiritual harpy (a bird of prey with a woman’s face) attacking myself or others.
The way back home to my true heart – seeing through compassionate eyes – each of us inhabits that spark of life, all of us being works in progress – especially me. LOL.
PS This image solidifies my intent not to go there.